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Nervous Fucking Break Down

August 16, 2007

Well, it’s that time of year again and our anniversary party is only a couple of days away. The stress is eating me up inside and I really don’t want another fiasco like last year’s; the only manager to date, not to have that year’s anniversary party do better than the previous year… FUUUUUCK! I don’t need this!

 

The year before that, I had maxed out my bonus’ by midnight, last year I struggled to hit my second bonus by the end of the night. Two weeks ago I was turning away girls because I had too many dancers, now I’m down to six… I DON’T NEED THIS STRESS!

 

Man life so much more simple when I was just the DJ, all I had to do was show up, rock the crowd, and make sure everybody had a good time… I’m good at that!

 

Last year was a fluke, it had to have been, I don’t know if I can deal with that look of disappointment from by boss again. I don’t know why his opinion of me is so important anyway… of coarse I do, he’s not just the best employer I’ve ever had, but he’s been one hell of a friend and mentor to me. He’s taught me so many things, not just about business, but politics and life in general. I value his opinion and his opinion of me. Who am I kidding? I value those pats on the back for doing a good job more than I do the financial rewards.

 

I can’t help but feel like I’ve forgotten something.

 

I’ve covered all of my bases right? I’ve taken care of the advertising, I’ve booked the live guests, we’ve practiced the topless boxing over and over again, I’ve got boxes of porn to give away, and enough t-shirts to clothe a fucking army…

 

Man why did I have to fire the head DJ last week!?!? I had the whole night planned out, down to the minute in three and a half minute intervals. Now I’ve got to break in a new DJ in just under a week and have him ready not just to be able to carry the weekend, but to be able to carry the busiest night of the year. It’s one thing to spin for a constant 30-40 people, but it’s a whole new story when you look up from the booth and see 100+ people and you’re expected to not just entertain them but to control them. I hope he don’t fold under the pressure… ARRGGGHHHHHHH! I DON’T NEED THIS SHIT, I DON’T NEED THIS PRESSURE!

 

At this point there ain’t much else I can do except close my eyes, dive head strong into it, and hope for the best. I guess we’ll find out this weekend… Here’s hoping for the best *cheers*

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